The Bachelor Finale: The Great Escape

Bachelor Nation,

It began like any other. Chris Harrison, America’s stepdad, recapped the previous week’s episode, then sauntered onstage with the swagger of Matthew McConaughey driving a Lincoln. We’re not new to this. This isn’t our first rodeo. But when he said this was, for realsies, the most dramatic Bachelor finale of all time, he was not kidding. This finale (part ONE, mind you) looked all…